Can You ~ Handle The Truth ?

Blog Stream : The Brand New.


Advice Blog on life, love, sex, and anything else we can get our hand on. Tonight we will talk about something simple. Integrity.

In life we come across choices . We make several a day . What coffee to drink, what to do at our meetings with our clientele, How to handle a fight with a co worker , How to talk to our fiends. List goes on .

The one thing I tell my friends always under any circumstance is to never lie. Never steal, Never cheat out any one. The only thing a man has is his word. If you do not have your word what then does a man have?

In a marriage with no trust , what foundation do you have ? None.

In a war , you have 2 soldiers out on the field alone . With out trust , can they survive ?

If your kids can not trust in their parents word , whose word can they trust ?   If I tell you I give you my word and i do not follow through , then my word means nothing. Even if it was not as important to me as it was to you, I need to follow through . It was my word.

If I say I love you or I care but do nothing to follow through on my word , what do my words mean ? Nothing.

In today's society we throw out our words with no intention of follow through. There is no brother hood, no commodery , no integrity. We live in a world of takers. Love is not built and friendships do not last.


We wonder why marriages break up, our dating lives are a joke or our friendships aren't what they should be.  Be the person you should be with out expecting a return.

I'm tired of hearing screw everyone because I've been screwed. ....

You see - 

Life is a stage , what is your part ? We live once . To inspire , to create beauty, love, joy,

be true to yourself not your pain or your wounds. Feel something and don't be afraid to do it. Go out side of your box today. Meet a stranger and learn something about them.

Keep your integrity.

~ Agent Orange

On The Contrary

It's cold out side , the rain is streaming from unforgiving clouds as I play Finch - Ender , on my phone . 

This blog is an advice blog and as I sit alone in this hotel room I'm trying to gather my own wisdoms to get me home today . 

The real journey is our silent one . The one we walk alone . So many people think for instance I'm searching for love .

Indeed I'm not seeking it out , I just want to find it in a passing crowd - and hold its hand . 

I fly a thousand miles and I find myself here writing you . 

Because what I do know is, I find myself grabbing at finger tips as one is always letting go - 

I have no answer . I do know that I found myself in a pile of tears last night , not because I'm confused or lost , but tired 

Tired of being another face 

Among a hundred faces 

In the crowd 

- Agent Orange 

Childs Love

As I leave my daughter this morning at pre - school something happened as we did our morning routine of giving each other's hands about a thousand kisses ( in case we miss each other later we have extra kisses ) we hug and say our sweet good byes . Raigan is almost 4 and she's pretty smart and emotional . 

When she first started in school she would scream so hard and cry I couldn't bear it . The teacher would have to hold her back and all the kisses in the world wouldn't help . I would digress to my car in tears . In all the turmoil she was in , I swear I was in more watching her cry . 

Did anyone understand the pain mothers go through ? I wanted to save her so bad 

I couldn't . 

The days went on and on , crying and crying every day . One day I thought to do something silly as she watched me walk away , I danced shaking my booty shamelessly in the parking lot in my Jammie's . She laughed so hard . Along with 50 other kids , as parents stared in judgement , I didn't care , it took her pain away . Every day I've danced for her .

This morning she didn't ask me to dance as I walked away . I was glad and sad . It's been 2 1/2 years today nothing . I walked away thinking my baby growing up . 

As I made my way down the hall I heard her screaming and crying I ran back asked her what's wrong as tears streamed down her face , she said , mommy you didn't do the booty dance !

I hugged her , and danced . I was almost relieved . 

It's funny how much we love our children and how much these small things mean to us , even if it's a booty dance . 

It's love 

- Agent Orange 

37

36 has come and gone . This past year has been the most amazing and the most heart breaking . 

I've found myself in situations I never thought I would be brave enough to ever stand to do and at the same time left situations I never thought I'd have the courage to leave . 

Starting beginning of last year I had to say good bye to the most amazing man I ever met . Flying to Colorado to do it , driving race cars and going home . 

I had an amazing fun job driving 200k cars racing on freeways with my best friends staying up all night laughing . 

I had hard times as a single mom when months were slow , or hurting my back and my trainer trying to get me back to health . Teaching me how to be strong physically and mentally . What a rough journey it's been . 

Also  finding myself on my knees praying as a single mom working 300 hours a month trying to pay the bills trying to make it to the gym , trying to see my friends and love my kids , find love all over again . 

Yes in 2 weeks I'll be 37 , I have a new job . It's the people who love us who help me get through . 

May we reach every goal this year - 

- Agent Orange 

The Real Deal

I'm curled up on the couch it's cold outside . Today I feel like Carrie Bradshaw and us girls wonder how to know the real deal . 

I once shared Pad Thai with a handsome man whom was married he told me , " Amy , every man holds a deck of cards , they are all playing a hand ." 

I've definitely lived some years playing my own . Left a trail of broken hearts , but what happens when that heart is yours ? 

How do we set apart our men as kings or jokers ? 

There's 2 parts to this I want to direct your attention too . 

1. You may have a king , he may just not be meant for you . 

2. You may have a joker indeed . 

A. You may have a joker , he tells you he does not want commitment in the beginning , he is honest . But you have some sort of I can change him ear plugs on . This is not the jokers fault . Sorry girls . 

B . You have a joker he tells you but you catch feelings . Well it happens . If joker does not have feelings back not jokers fault . 

C. You have a king he is perfect and your perfect but your not perfect together . 

Sad story . 

D. This is where is gets tricky your dating you don't know what the intentions are .

You don't know the hand . This is where the late conversations come in . What do I do next ? 

I feel like at this point if he's nice or she's nice and there confusing you , at this point they could hold anything right ? 

Maybe there scared ? But wouldn't a king make you feel safe ? Don't stay at this place for to long . You might have a losing bet 

- Agent Orange 

Fact V Fiction

Today's blog is based on words vs actions ..... 

I'm faced with one of my best friends grimaced text of finding out her boyfriend is cheating . But let's take this conversation by the hand and take a walk for a moment . I'd like to captivate you , this isn't about cheating at all . 

What got me was a month ago a friend of mine I had a crush on for 6 months touted about integrity and canceled on a date because he was out of town , but in deed I knew he was a meer 30 min away cozy with his girl friend . So what does this blog boil down down to ? 

Any one can give lip service . You can promise me your not this or not that . 

But when a person says one thing but does another - for me that's an exit out .

Not just relationships but friendships . 

Trust is the glue that bonds every foundation . 

What happens when a foundation is shattered ? 

If you love me show me . Don't just say it.

If you like someone don't lie or do whatever it takes to follow through on a promise . 

We're all human no one is perfect of course . But if your saying one thing and doing another that's an issue . 

- Agent Orange 

Science behind - love at first sight

I'm listening to Love is Love by Stereo Alchemy love this song . As a writer the one thing I'm not to perfect at writing about is romance . Why ? Maybe I'm not that overly romantic mushy girl who spends Saturday's watching chick flicks or reading 50 shades of grey . I've always been more of a Tom boy , who likes to be a bit vampy . I'm more a little intellectual and sometimes a little blonde and quirky.

But What I never knew was love at first sight . I didn't believe in it at all , I mocked love and everything hallmark . But I know now , I was wrong . I can only hope to find that love again and hold its virtual hand . 

The science behind love at first sight is tricky . So listen close . Come closer . 

We go on mindless dates with expectations and get let down one after another after another . 

It's not their fault it's ours . Let me explain . We go on a date unknowingly carrying fears and hurt from the past we are guarded . We go out with walls . We are quick to judge and get rid of new people.

Our joy and adventure is lost . We haven't mourned our past . 

Think for a moment if you walked in a room saw a beautiful girl but had no worries of her hurting you ? Cheating ? Lying ? You were free to feel ? Get to know each other , be happy ? 

Love at first sight ? Your open . Your heart is open . Imagine 2 people walk in a room . Not letting the past dictate their future , 2 magnates attracted to each other . No walls . A rare moment . 

Love at first sight . Courage at first sight .

Why should every wound keep you from being whole again ? 

So many of us single , we don't sleep at night because we're afraid of the games,  of the let downs . Or can we be open to what can happen . Because the more courage you have the less pain there will be . 

- Agent Orange